Writers don't often say anything that readers don't already know, unless its a news story. A writer's greatest pleasure is revealing to people things they knew but did not know they knew. Or did not realize everyone else knew, too. This produces a warm sense of fellow feeling and is the best a writer can do.

I've learned... That when your newly born grandchild holds your little finger in his little fist, that you're hooked for life.

When you get older you have to be careful about always saying, "Things aren't as good as they used to be." But it's hard not to.

The third rule of life is this: Everything you buy today is smaller, more expensive, and not as good as it was yesterday.

Women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage!

Don't rule out working with your hands. It does not preclude using your head.

Not many people in this world are as lucky as I've been. ... All this time I've been paid to say what is on my mind on television. You don't get any luckier in life than that.