If you smile when no one else is around, you really mean it.

I've learned .... That when you harbor bitterness, happiness will dock elsewhere.

I spent my first 50 years trying to become known as a writer and the next 30 trying to avoid being famous. I walk down the street or go to a football game and people shout, 'Hey Andy'. I hate that.

A little-recognized value of listening and inquiring relates to the realization that in human relationships, it is frequently not what the I've learned ... that it is best to give advice in only two circumstances: when it is requested and when it is a life-threatening situation.

I don't know anything offhand that mystifies Americans more than the cotton they put in pill bottles. Why do they do it? Are you supposed to put the cotton back in once you've taken a pill out?

I've learned ... that no one is perfect until you fall in love with them.

Numbers tend to give the impression that there's more order in the world than there is.