Howard's unbelievably nutty, politically incorrect style is probably the single biggest influence on me.

For a degenerate like me, Vegas is like a walk down memory lane. Last time I went to Vegas, I went to my old coke dealer's kid's bar mitzvah.

The point of drinking in moderation is that sometimes you don't drink in moderation.

Comedians, we're just people who whine. But we happen to be funny when we whine.

Everytime I go to Vegas, I seem to incur some kind of fine.

It is funny because the guy who is my boss now, Howard Stern, has a similarity there. He got big being a regular guy. He wasn't the greatest looking guy in the world

I have gay friends, I support gay rights, I have nothing against the gay community, but when I see two guys kissing, I think it's gross. And, by the way, it's gross when 99% of straight people do it, too.