Jason Alexander is a committed actor, he went from working on a show about nothing to actually doing nothing.

All I can say is that you only realize how big your mountain is once youre laying motionless, helpless, and hopeless in the valley below. No one goes there on purpose, if you get what Im saying, because the only way to find your personal low is to slip and roll down that mountain of yours, straight through to the bottom, no holds barred.

Hugs are great, but - better than drugs? Come on. Let me put it to you this way: I never drove to Harlem at 4 a.m. to get somebody to hug me.

When political correctness first started coming around, it ruined Andrew Dice Clay and Eddie Murphy's stand-up career. Sam Kinison died at just the right time, 'cause no one was going to tolerate what he was saying anymore either.

Googling me, you talk about being depressed. First of all there's 18 websites that predict my early death.

I got into comedy so I could stay out all night.

Women will do anything Oprah Winfrey says, and that is why we can't have women voting.