I'm a comic, so I like to stay nocturnal. I work 10 p.m. to 1 a.m.

It's a life of five-card draw, and you know what? When God asked me - I'm fine with the card I got. I'm gonna play this.

I want to see Toby Maguire fight Christian Bale.

Howard's unbelievably nutty, politically incorrect style is probably the single biggest influence on me.

I like gambling on stuff that you don't know anything about. That's when it's exciting.

I used to be a longshoreman. I didn't go to college. I have a voice that when I say something, it can sound way meaner than you think it is.

I've never been swimming, and that's because it's never been more than half an hour since I last ate.