I got into comedy so I could stay out all night.

Googling me, you talk about being depressed. First of all there's 18 websites that predict my early death.

When you did impressions on 'MADtv,' the producers gave you a Walkman that played huge sections of whatever movie was being parodied, with your character's catchphrases recorded on a loop. You'd wear this thing around during rehearsals and for a week listen to the voice you had to impersonate over and over again. It drove all of us crazy.

By the time I am Howard's age I hope to be long retired. I don't plan on working that long.

Of course in show business there are two ways to play it and I am not politically correct so I am not going to get endorsements or anything like that

Artie is going to do what ever Artie wants to do.

A weekend in Vegas without gambling and drinking is just like being a born-again Christian.