Richard Lewis has this incredible ability to look like he's just... you know it's an act that's been honed. What you have to do in standup is create spontaneity, somehow; even though you've done this act a million times, you gotta look like you're almost just thinking of it now, to make it entertainer.

My dad was Superman to me, and in my mind he always will be.

I like gambling on stuff that you don't know anything about. That's when it's exciting.

Eddie Murphy said once in an interview that nothing is offensive if it's funny. I sort of agree with that, but if something's funny and you're the subject of it, sometimes it's more offensive. If someone's insulting you, you want them to sound like an idiot.

Googling me, you talk about being depressed. First of all there's 18 websites that predict my early death.

I want to see Toby Maguire fight Christian Bale.

If Mike Tyson was the voice of your GPS, would you ever not use it?