Term insurance is temporary, but your problem is permanent.

I never thought I was gonna live in LA. I thought I was gonna live in New York forever.

I rarely use the telephone because he may not want to see me. I have a better chance of seeing the man I want to see if I do go. Besides, switchboard girls and secretaries have become very good. They've learned to take you apart. 'Who? Why? What for? What company?' You don't always get by. I seldom call on the phone. I'd rather go.

If you're starting to lose your faith in the general intelligence of the American populous, there's nothing like them mistaking pop culture for Van Gogh as a sign that people still read their history books and care about art.

I'm just the least funny person in a room full of funny people, which is basically every single day of work for me.

Doing something costs something. Doing nothing costs something. And, quite often, doing nothing costs a lot more!

I do not sell life insurance. I sell money. I sell dollars for pennies apiece. My dollars cost 3 cents per dollar per year.