Term insurance is temporary, but your problem is permanent.

I'm just the least funny person in a room full of funny people, which is basically every single day of work for me.

If people understood what life insurance does, we wouldn't need salesmen to sell it. People would come knocking on the door. But they don't understand.

I think I'm the funniest guy in a room full of unfunny people.

If you’ve got a problem make it a procedure and it won’t be a problem anymore.

You haven’t done anything wrong. You just haven’t done anything, and that’s what’s wrong.

I get up in the morning and I put on makeup and then I say somebody else's words in someone else's clothes, and then I go home and watch TV, have a glass of whisky and go to bed. And I'm overcompensated for that. So it's insane to not use that pedestal to try and at least help someone or something that's in need.