It's not a beard, it's an animal I've trained to sit very still.

Contentment is knowing you're right

Aldous Huxley took the drug mescaline and then chronicled his experience in the book The Doors of Perception. Now, I don't actually think that's the first thing he wrote: he probably wrote 'my brain is melting' ten thousand times, but it was the book that the critics latched on to.

Work hard, save and live within your means.

Thank God for Darwin, eh?

Orchestras have often been used to conjure up the natural world: Swans, sharks, trout, but not, as far as I know, the often maligned jellyfish.

I'm English and as such I crave disappointment. That's why I buy Kinder Surprise.