I feel sorry for James Blunt, he has to wake up every morning and think 'Oh my God, I'm James Blunt, what have I done?'

I am a confectionery-based existentialist.

Yes. Yes, when we live our life like 1950s detective films. I often go to my fridge, "Hullo, we're out of milk. I say mother, where's the milk?"

I'm English and as such I crave disappointment. That's why I buy Kinder Surprise.

Come to Belarus, where wild animals will steal your fruit

I'm quite lucky, because I've got a small, decorative concrete pig.

Nostalgia: How long's that been around?