Add a drop of lavender to milk, leave town with an orange, and pretend you're laughing at it.

I tend to go through periods worrying, "Where am I going, I can't see a way out of this," and it becomes quite stressful. But sometimes you have to take a bet on yourself.

There we go, that's it. I just hold my hand in this position for the next couple of hours.

Marijuana? It's harmless really, unless you fashion it into a club and beat somebody over the head with it

I try to appreciate the simple things. I've just been camping with my son and I enjoyed that just as much if not more than a holiday in a posh hotel. I like making a cup of tea and bacon sarnie in the morning.

Contentment is knowing you're right. Happiness is knowing someone else is wrong.

I got ham but I'm not a Hamster