A new father quickly learns that his child invariably comes to the bathroom at precisely the times when he's in there, as if he needed company. The only way for this father to be certain of bathroom privacy is to shave at the gas station.

You are not going to 'go forth.' You are going to take that damn hat off and you're going to get a job.

Even though your kids will consistently do the exact opposite of what you're telling them to do, you have to keep loving them just as much.

Public education is a good foundation on which to build a better life for each of us. And if we want to prove to these children who never made the mess in the first place that education is worth the trouble, our schools have to inspire them so they can do what they ought to do.

Ours is a youth culture, and like a golf tournament, we honor only low scores.

My dad came over to the house... went into his pocket and pulled out a handful of money, and began to pass it out to the children... This was the same man who, when I was his child, I would ask him for 50 cents, this man would tell me his life's story.

You are more important to yourself than you think you are.