Pot is a better drug than alcohol. I'll prove it to you. You're at a ball game or a concert, and someone's really violent and agressive and obnoxious, are they drunk or are they smoking pot?

They believe the bible is the exact word of God - Then they change the bible! Pretty presumptuous, hu huh? "I think what God meant to say..."

This is the idea that has made me...an anonymous figure in America...If you have children here tonight...they are NOT special.

I saw...a kid on a leash. You seen these people? Kid on a leash? How horrible. Put him in the pound where he belongs.

The role of the comedian is to say 'Wait a minute' when a consensus starts to form.

I believe that God left certain drugs growing naturally upon our planet to help speed up and facilitate our evolution.

Just a simple choice, right now, between fear and love. The eyes of fear want you to put bigger locks on your doors, buy guns, close yourself off. The eyes of love instead see all of us as one.