What did moths bump into before the electric light bulb was invented? Boy, the lightbulb really screwed the moth up didn't it? Are there moths on their way to the sun now going, It's gonna be worth it!.

The CIA has a plot...they've used before to get rid of world leaders. Only problem...is convincing Hussein...to fly to Dallas.

I'm just trying to rid the world of all these fevered egos that are tainting our collective unconscious.

I don't care if you're obscene, filthy, horrendous -- as long as you're honest.

Isn't that weird, we've made nature against the law. That's how un-natural we've become.

It is hard to quit smoking. Every one of them looks real good to me right about now. Every cigarette looks like it was made by God, rolled by Jesus and moistened shut with Claudia Schiffer's pussy.

I hate patriotism... I can't stand it. It's a round world last time I checked.