That's what I hate about the war on drugs. All day long we see those commercials: "Here's your brain, here's your brain on drugs", "Just Say No", "Why do you think they call it dope?" … And then the next commercial is [singing] "This Bud's for yooouuuu." C'mon, everybody, let's be hypocritical bastards. It's okay to drink your drug. We meant those other drugs. Those untaxed drugs. Those are the ones that are bad for you.

Humanity is just a virus with shoes.

I am a misanthropic humanist... Do I like people? They're great, IN THEORY.

So, it's good to be here, wherever I am.

It's all about money, not freedom. If you think you're free, try going somewhere without money, okay?

Good comedy helps people know they're not alone. Great comedy provides an answer.

I left in love, in laughter, and in truth, and wherever truth, love and laughter abide, I am there in spirit.