It's you people dying from nothing that are screwed. I got all sorts of neat gadgets waiting for me...oxygen tent, iron lung.

Oh my God. Lift me up out of this illusion, Lord. Heal my perception that I might know only reality and only you.

Let's do some comedy. I always like to add some comedy to my show. Those who've seen me before might know that.

We killed 6 innocent people, launching 22, I think $3 million apiece missiles on Baghdad...that's a little bit overdoing it.

Ultimately, it is in fun. It is supposed to be highly entertaining.

I don't mean to sound bitter, cold, or cruel, but I am, so that's how it comes out.

It has become more and more obvious that there is one political party in America, and that is The Business Party.