I don't need anything as long as I have my family, friends, millions of dollars, unlimited pussy.

Do you guys like impressions? "Why?" That was Socrates.

People give me money and I don't know why, my real collection plate is an empty cup held by a homeless guy.

What's that? My six song album entitled Bo Fo Sho is currently available on iTunes? With three songs that have never been heard on the internet? Uh, and if I try to pirate it for free I'll get AIDS? I would have guessed scurvy. Well, see you later ghost of Dr.Martin Luther King Jr.

I masturbate 'cause I'm the only one whose standards are low enough to f-k me.

I see young people being dismissed for supposedly wanting only "stupid" and "easy" material, or that they don't have an attention span longer than three minutes. I disagree with all those statements; I just think they aren't true. I'm saying that our generation wants stuff that is substantial and challenging, as well as thoughtful and endearing. Well, I don't know if I'm doing that, but I'm trying.

I've been doin' drive-bys all of my life. Except the bullets are newspapers, the car is my bike.