I'd really love to make something that doesn't involve my stupid face.

Happy Thanksgiving! I broke into Best Buy and stole a copy of Pocahontas to celebrate.

I don't consciously try to make things difficult as much as I try to make them a little different. I like all kinds of laughs. I tried to make a show that elicit groans, guffaws, chuckles, boos.

My persona on stage was always coming from a place of I know better than you and I'm going to be a little bit pretentious in your face with these sort of crass ideas.

Drugs kill, just like cancer. So don't smoke... tumors.

I remember being superyoung, like nine or ten years old, and thinking, 'Man, I wonder what famous people eat for breakfast. They must have some special kind of cereal!' My mind was so warped by the idea of fame.

For fifteen cents a day you can feed an African, they eat pennies.