My next door neighbor just had a pacemaker installed. They're still working the bugs out, though. Every time he makes love, my garage door opens.

The old water heater in my dressing room was working, but it was kind of tired. It gave off about as much warmth as an agent's handshake.

Every Naval vessel has a contingent of Marines aboard. After all, the Sailors have to have someone to dance with.

After the 1984 Summer Olympics, Reagan wanted to add the U.S. volleyball team to his Cabinet. He figured if they can't shove his programs down Congress' throat, nobody can.

I'll shoot my age if I have to live to be 105.

There's a very apt saying in show business: "If you don't go over budget in Paris, you're either very rich or very sick. "

Lots of travel, away from home.