Nobody can tell me what I can or can't do, except they can.
Some dead people said smart stuff.
I'm completely changing my diet. My nutritionist recommends I must now stop eating food I have already eliminated.
A good way to keep your relationship together is not to scream in terror when you see your partner naked.
I love my mom! You can too for $12!
My mom just told me it's impossible to know what's going to happen in life. Except with breakfast, cause she eats the same thing every day.