Some dead people said smart stuff.
I just had a pedicure. My feet are soft like a baby's behind. If his ass was covered in calluses.
I think when you dissect a joke too much, you have ruined whatever there is in comedy.
I become a chameleon for wherever I am.
I love telling stories and acting and entertaining people. I don't want to make fun of people.
The Comedy Store - all three rooms were filled with 800 people in the room. And during that time, all these guys and some women, but mostly guys who weren't funny were doing stand up for a living; they weren't accountants, they were making $30-$50 grand a year on the road, or more.