Oil is sixty dollars a barrel. There are terrorists everywhere. We have a catastrophe in our world every ten minutes. I don't know how anybody's getting through anything. Right now, people just need to be entertained.

Some dead people said smart stuff.

Most people argue over who's right, not about what the truth is.

I love telling stories and acting and entertaining people. I don't want to make fun of people.

My father once told me, and it's stuck with me to this day: As you walk through life, every time you fart it pushes you forward.

If you're a host of a video show and you're on the cleanest show on television for eight years, people want to say, 'Well, that's what that person does.' That was the dilemma for me, career-wise.

I never went to camp as a kid. I couldn't get into an Ivy League school. I wouldn't join a biker club.