Around comics, I've always been known for, oh, that's not dirty, this is dirty.

Today is the first day of the rest of your life. And if that doesn't work out for you, Tomorrow is the first day of the rest of your life.

My father once told me, and it's stuck with me to this day: As you walk through life, every time you fart it pushes you forward.

I just had a pedicure. My feet are soft like a baby's behind. If his ass was covered in calluses.

My mom told me she thinks a man in the market felt her up today. I asked, Where did he touch you? She said, On my knee, Bobby.

It's a new day: Full of promise and love. The only thing that can take away that great feeling is - reading the news or speaking to people.

Around comics, I've always been known for, oh, that's not dirty, this is dirty.