My dad's like, If your mom and I are having sex and we videotape it and she falls out of bed funny, can I win ten-thousand dollars?

I will always prefer a hardback book, but I'm drawn to digital because it's so easy to acquire them when I'm having a need-to-read moment.

Concerned we're in a time where politicians can't even fake sincerity. Aren't they supposed to be good at that?

No one gets a free ride. Except maybe bus drivers.

Most people argue over who's right, not about what the truth is.

I don't censor myself, but I don't want to force my sick-skewed version of the world, either.

The squirrel in my yard really knows his way around the neighborhood.