I think when you dissect a joke too much, you have ruined whatever there is in comedy.

Most people argue over who's right, not about what the truth is.

I love my mom! You can too for $12!

All I've ever done is try to entertain my way through a life that often has a huge amount of heaviness in it.

I was on Entourage last week smoking a bong and making out with hookers and I did show them that before, cause it wasn't a hard 'r' cause a lot of people are watching that show that they know, not my little one - she's 12, but very sophisticated so it's an unusual case.

Valuable people are undervalued.

I can't do negative, needy, or narcissistic anymore. Oh wait, I can still do the last one, aw nuts.