I think when you dissect a joke too much, you have ruined whatever there is in comedy.

What do you do if you're in the car and your girlfriend touches your crotch then asks you to remind her to get kitchen scissors?

Jon Lovitz. Jon, your act is like masturbation: you're the only one who enjoys it, and you should be arrested for doing it in public.

I think when you dissect a joke too much, you have ruined whatever there is in comedy.

I have the brain of a German Shepherd and the body of a 16-year-old boy; they’re both in my car and I want you to see them

A lot of the comedians don't even tell the joke. Like only three tell the joke, the rest of them dissect it.

My mom told me she thinks a man in the market felt her up today. I asked, Where did he touch you? She said, On my knee, Bobby.