I love my mom! You can too for $12!

Now people want what the movie was about, which is violent comedy. And that's really what The Aristocrats is based on - what will a family do out of desperation.

I was going to do a big radio show, and I said to my driver, 'Radio can wait, take me to the Full House house.' It literally was a drive-by. I photobombed the Full House house yesterday. I took like 20 pictures because I thought I didn't look good in any of these - you can't see the house! You gotta really show that that's the house!

The other day my twelve-year-old says to me, I don't feel like I'm with you right now. You're in the car with me, you're checking your e-mail, you're not listening to me, I don't feel like I'm with you. And I say, You know what? That was your mother's gripe, too. And she was right. And you're also correct. When you cop to something, you get to the next level. In this case, the next level is: I just learned something from my twelve-year-old.

If someone sprays windex in your food it can give you diarrhea. But once you wipe it off your windows, you're fine.

Some people rely on rumors and gossip because they are devoid of any original thought.

25, 30 years ago, that meant something, they were making some money. And they were doing all sorts of comedy, screaming at the audience, basically crowd control. And then there was the whole urban comedy scene.