I'm psyched about what I can contribute that can be meaningful to myself and to others.

The selfish and usually pointless approach is to try to get both done simultaneously - accomplish your work at hand while begging forgiveness of those close to you while you're basically working in front of them during what could've been specifically 'quality time.'

I can't do negative, needy, or narcissistic anymore. Oh wait, I can still do the last one, aw nuts.

It's smart to marry your yoga teacher so when you get divorced you know how to go down on yourself.

If you're hanging out with two negative people, do they equal one positive person?

What I've learned about comedy people is that they're defined by the harshest level they've been to, their personal Auschwitz.

Wise men say, only fools rush in. Wise men are so slow.