25, 30 years ago, that meant something, they were making some money. And they were doing all sorts of comedy, screaming at the audience, basically crowd control. And then there was the whole urban comedy scene.

I can't do negative, needy, or narcissistic anymore. Oh wait, I can still do the last one, aw nuts.

Today is the first day of the rest of your life. And if that doesn't work out for you, Tomorrow is the first day of the rest of your life.

My father once told me, and it's stuck with me to this day: As you walk through life, every time you fart it pushes you forward.

Most people argue over who's right, not about what the truth is.

Apparently my street has a leaf blower gang who tag team all day, so the sounds of the leaf blower are forever blowing from dawn to dusk.

It's 103 comedians, or however many it is, and how would everyone tell it. It's enough people of substance that it makes you think of the people who aren't there that are alive.