The secret to raising children is to love them... And teach them to operate in a way you can tolerate them the best.

I just did a play in New York which has been my best experience that Ive had for maybe ever. It was Paul Weitzs play called Privilege and I was in New York for three months.

Now people want what the movie was about, which is violent comedy. And that's really what The Aristocrats is based on - what will a family do out of desperation.

I become a chameleon for wherever I am.

My mom told me she thinks a man in the market felt her up today. I asked, Where did he touch you? She said, On my knee, Bobby.

I don't censor myself, but I don't want to force my sick-skewed version of the world, either.

Found a bunch of old shower caps in my house. Was gonna throw them out but realized they make excellent porta potties for long road trips.