Apparently my street has a leaf blower gang who tag team all day, so the sounds of the leaf blower are forever blowing from dawn to dusk.

My favorite procrastination is to make the choice to have valuable times with human beings that I care about instead of holing myself up alone to get my work done.

It's a new day: Full of promise and love. The only thing that can take away that great feeling is - reading the news or speaking to people.

The nature of comedy is 'just do it.' But I think what's interesting about it is this joke has been around and why. And it's just saying what's wrong and how wrong can you be if you say it.

I'm a believer that when one door closes another one opens. But why does the one opening always hit me full-speed-knob-first into my nuts?

Sometimes I wish I hadn't said something foolish. It is then that I realize the power of mime.

There was this whole middle time that only Chris Rock came out of, you know, 10 years ago it was Chris and a few other people, but that's about it. Chris is in a class of his own; I don't see another comedian who I put in high regard as him.