It's smart to marry your yoga teacher so when you get divorced you know how to go down on yourself.

As time goes on, the more I value doctors and plumbers. Doctors a little more. I can fix my own toilet but I still can't operate on myself.

It's so nice to share a day as beautiful as this one with hundreds of thousands of reckless drivers.

I am stressed because once I am flattened out so thin to be able to slide under a doorway, I may never be able to ever be unflattened so I could be regular sized again.

Nobody can tell me what I can or can't do, except they can.

My dad told me if I was ever intimidated by anyone, just picture them with their clothes off. He said that's how he dealt with my mom.

If you don't wake up every day happy, change something.