In a statement to the Associated Press earlier in the year, Jamie Lynn said she didn’t have a boyfriend. She said, ‘I’m keeping my options open.’ And by options, she meant legs.

I don't mean to be a racist but if you're going to get raped by a Japanese guy, it's not going to hurt at all.

The challenge is to keep it fresh. If you're talking about Britney Spears over and over, it's very hard to keep that interesting.

If someone took the 'F' letter off me, I'd be ucked.

A lot of amazing comedians that I've worked with just really follow their instincts and you can't really teach someone comedic timing. And you just kind of have it.

Or people who have one baby and go buy a minivan... how big is your baby?

I like to stay at home and sit on my ass.