Obviously, if I was serious about having a relationship with some one long-term, the last people I would introduce him to would be my family.
Chelsea HandlerPeople always tell me I need to have a kid, and I say, No, I don't. Because I wouldn't have just one kid; I'd have six. I need a huge family. So I just kind of fill my house with tons of rejects and misfits so it feels like I have a bunch of children.
Chelsea HandlerI don't understand what apps are on my phone. Why do they ask for passwords? Why do they all ask for different passwords? It's so frustrating that I end up just reading a book every time I try to go online.
Chelsea HandlerI had sex with a couple guys but it wasn't a baseball team. I saved that for my twenties.
Chelsea Handler