I would rather sit next to a transgender person and discuss why every single one I've met smells like a bar in the daytime than listen to people tell my why I want to have children and that I just don't know it yet. I do know, because I'm me and my feelings are the ones in my head. I don't want to have kids, and it's not a device to get attention or have conversations about it. I simply find children incredibly immature and, more often than not, dumb.

I got a vibrator that needed two nine volt batteries. What am I - R2D2? I don't know what to do with that.

I wasn’t like 'Oh, I'm going to marry 50 Cent...' I mean, seriously. But I did like him. He's very sweet and antithetical to what you'd think of him.

Laugh loudly, laugh often, and most important, laugh at yourself.

It became clear when I got in my car that Persians are only really good for two things. Oil and hummus.

I'm always happy to pitch in and do something. Everybody needs to be laughing a little.

I have a question. Do you guys think it's OK to drink while you're pregnant if you're planning on giving the baby up for adoption?