I don't like the word 'alcoholic'. I like to think of myself as an advanced drinker.

Anyone who is friends with Bill Clinton shouldn't be telling their wife about it.

Maybe they should name more drugs cute things. I don't do meth, but maybe if they called meth 'Stefanie' I would!

Sometimes, Chelsea, I wonder, how you get by from day to day. It's a good thing you're so voluptuous.

Paris Hilton is going on a goodwill mission to Rwanda. It’s the first time an entire Third World country will have to get immunizations for a visitor.

Don't choose the better guy, choose the guy that's gonna make you the better girl

You know what they say, when one door closes, another Belvedere opens.