I hate that people assume guys are the only ones to want sex. Girls want sex, too, and that shouldn't be a problem.

At some point during almost every romantic comedy, the female lead suddenly trips and falls, stumbling helplessly over something ridiculous like a leaf, and then some Matthew McConaughey type either whips around the corner just in the nick of time to save her or is clumsily pulled down along with her. That event predictably leads to the magical moment of their first kiss. Please. I fall ALL the time. You know who comes and gets me? The bouncer.

You know what they say, when one door closes, another Belvedere opens.

I don't understand what apps are on my phone. Why do they ask for passwords? Why do they all ask for different passwords? It's so frustrating that I end up just reading a book every time I try to go online.

Hispanics still have the highest rate amongst teens with babies so at least the future housekeeping is secure.

Pam Anderson and Rick Salomon just got themselves a marriage license. I think before she gets married again Pam needs to slow down and think about whether this is really the man she wants to spend three or four months of her life with.

It's a pleasure to play my sister because everything I've accused her of my whole life, I can now re-enact before her eyes.