Television doesn't make stars. It's the written media, the press, that makes stars.

Some Harvard guy said that acid would open our minds, pot wouldn't hurt us, and cocaine was benign.

Last good pratfall I did, I broke bones in both hands. I still feel it when people shake my hand.

The best advice I can give you about falling is to never land.

How much do I owe you?

The best comedy I ever did was when people didn't know who I was.

I guess I look so straight and normal nobody expects me to pick my nose and fall.