I'll go with the guy with one house. The guy with one house is scared about losing his house.

My dad worked every day. I didn't get into show business to work every day. So the fact that most days I get to like, spend really good time with my kids - that's what success is to me.

For the most part, comedy is the only fair part of show business.

Learn how to cook. Read books that will educate you. Get an education. Get a career. And support yourself. And live in a section of town that isn't conducive to violence.

You don't pay taxes - they take taxes.

Before I was a comedian, I thought the coolest thing that would happen to me was being a teenager... Boy, was I wrong!

If you live below your means, you can turn down stuff all the time.