Yeah, I love being famous. It's almost like being white, y'know?

Karaoke isn't fair when you're a comedian. The whole idea is to get people laughing and enjoying themselves, and I'm a professional funny guy.

When you're doing a big-budget movie and you're four on the call sheet, you've got a lot of free time.

I'm in show business... I want to hang out with Janet Jackson, not Jesse Jackson.

White man makes guns? No problem. Black rapper says "gun"? Congressional hearing.

The advantage that my children have is that my children are encountering the nicest white people that America has ever produced. Let’s hope America keeps producing nicer white people.

People are always going to, you know, find something wrong with people who are not the exact same as them. That's just what it is. Black, white, short, tall, religions, whatever. People are bad.