One of my daughters told me the other day, "Kevin Hart is funnier than you, Daddy." I told her, "Does Kevin Hart make you pancakes?"

No matter what kind of backgrounds two men are from, if you go, 'Hey, man, women are crazy,' you've got a friend.

Sometimes people offer you plays, they offer you parts, but they only offer it because I'm famous.

Oprah is rich; Bill Gates is wealthy. If Bill Gates woke up tomorrow with Oprah's money, he'd jump out of a window and slit his throat on the way down saying, 'I can't even put gas in my plane!'

When people try to read between the lines - critics, they have a job. Their job is to make something bigger than it is.

Yeah, I love being famous. It's almost like being white, y'know?

Stand-up comedy is like the lowest medium in all of show business in levels of respect.