They're working their way down. Next year, Todd Bridges gets the award. When I was a kid I wanted to be Eddie Murphy and now I'm a rip-off of Eddie Murphy.
Chris RockI used to work at McDonald's making minimum wage. You know what that means when someone pays you minimum wage? You know what your boos was trying to say? "Hey if I could pay you less, I would, but it's against the law."
Chris RockThe only acting you ever see at the Oscars is when people act like theyโre not mad they lost. Nicole Kidman was smiling so wide, she should have won an Emmy at the Oscars for her great performance. I was like, "If youโd done that in the movie, youโd have won an Oscar, girl."
Chris RockYou can never make a woman happy, it's impossible. I've never met a happy woman in my life. They're always complaining about something.
Chris RockI am just here to support the President of the United States. President of the United States is our boss, but he is also... you know, the President and the First Lady are kinda like the Mom and the Dad of the country. And when your Dad says something you listen, and when you don't it will usually bite you on the ass later on. So, I'm here to support the President.
Chris Rock