Before I was a comedian, I thought the coolest thing that would happen to me was being a teenager... Boy, was I wrong!

When I hear people talk about juggling or the sacrifices they make for their children, I look at them like they're crazy because sacrifice infers that there was something better to do than the thing - than being with your children.

When you're white, the sky's the limit. When you're black, the limit's the sky.

I used to work at McDonald's making minimum wage. You know what that means when someone pays you minimum wage? You know what your boos was trying to say? "Hey if I could pay you less, I would, but it's against the law."

They're working their way down. Next year, Todd Bridges gets the award. When I was a kid I wanted to be Eddie Murphy and now I'm a rip-off of Eddie Murphy.

You can never make a woman happy, it's impossible. I've never met a happy woman in my life. They're always complaining about something.

Wealth is not about having a lot of money; it's about having a lot of options.