I pray there's a God...I know there's an Oprah.

You can never make a woman happy, it's impossible. I've never met a happy woman in my life. They're always complaining about something.

Every town has the same two malls: the one white people go to and the one white people used to go to.

I want to really take chances. I want to be funny in a lot of different ways. I'd like to be great. I want to reach for greatness.

I've been married for 10 years and, you know, it's hard, you spruce it up and you go places. How do you spruce up anything? Artificially. You go places and do things.

Comedy is a group activity, a verbal orgy.

So there's a cloud of rage around me, but being an artist kind of changes that. No matter what you thought coming in, what ignorant thing you believed, you're in show business for two years, you're like, "OK, I was wrong." It's hard to be mad at any particular group of people when you're an artist.