Even if you meet the perfect person, it ain’t gonna be at the perfect time. You’re married, they’re single. That’s right. You’re Jewish, they’re Palestinian. You’re a Mexican, they’re a raccoon. You’re a black woman, he’s a black man.

Women need food, water, and compliments That's right. And an occasional pair of shoes.

I'm severely overrated. I'm just above a hack.

I met so many people after I got rich and famous, and I learned that you can't ultimately trust people unless they were your friends when you were broke.

We got no wealthy black people. We got rich people. Shaq is rich. The guy who signs his checks is wealthy.

You can't have anything valuable in your house. Niggers will break in and take it all! Everything white people don't like about black people, black people don't like about black people. It's like our own personal civil war. On one side, there's black people. On the other, you've got niggers. The niggers have got to go. I love black people, but I hate niggers. I am tired of niggers. Tired, tired, tired.

I've been married for 10 years and, you know, it's hard, you spruce it up and you go places. How do you spruce up anything? Artificially. You go places and do things.