A man is only as faithful as his options.

They're working their way down. Next year, Todd Bridges gets the award. When I was a kid I wanted to be Eddie Murphy and now I'm a rip-off of Eddie Murphy.

My mother is the kind of woman you don't want to be in line behind at the supermarket. She has coupons for coupons.

The U.S government hates rap music

I try to stay with it and I try to stay in contact with comedians and just keep comedians in my life 'cause comedians are their own species. If you get away from them, especially as a comedian, I think it's dangerous.

Kids always act up the most before they go to sleep. And when I see the Tea Party and all this stuff, it actually feels like racism’s almost over. Because this is the last - this is the act up before the sleep. They’re going crazy. They’re insane. You want to get rid of them - and the next thing you know, they’re fucking knocked out. And that’s what’s going on in the country right now.

The Democrats should have an empty chair on stage for the entire DNC, and when anyone asks who it belongs to, they can say Osama bin Laden.