Please call your second witness, and then call your mother, she worries.

There's many times this year I've sat back and thought, I'm making a living from making things up. It's the only skill I have so I've been really lucky.

Hey, come on, I've seen younger faces on money. Money.

You know, in the 1970's, when I was in high school, I belonged to a band called the Happy Funk Band. Until an unfortunate typo caused us to be expelled from school.

This just in: Beverly Hills 90210, Cleveland Browns 3.

The people who influenced me most were the people who said I would never make it. They gave me a thirst for revenge.

Our top story tonight: Famous TV dolphin flipper was arrested today on prostitution ring charges. He allegedly was seen transporting two 16 year olds across state line for immoral porpoises.