Always remember, you don't stop shitting your pants because you grow old. You grow old because you stop shitting your pants.
Dana GouldWhoever coined the phrase, killing two birds with one stone, not only hated birds but also thought we needed to conserve stones.
Dana GouldApproached literally, there's but a hair's difference between You'd better not pout, you'd better not cry, and Don't scream.
Dana GouldI don't want to say my mom is late on trends, but this morning she said, Have a shagadelic day, sweetheart.
Dana Gould