Women are like pumpkins; you search and search for the perfect one, bring it home, and the next thing you know, you're looking for a knife.
Dana GouldWhen I was in high school, girls made fun of me for liking vampire movies. Now, I'd be their king. Time machine, where are you?
Dana GouldCowboy boots with a suit? You're a rough, tough businessman. Chaps with a bow tie? You're in the rough, tough man business.
Dana Gould