Cowboy boots with a suit? You're a rough, tough businessman. Chaps with a bow tie? You're in the rough, tough man business.

In a world of war, pain and suffering, all I want for Christmas is an underwater watch and a silver clutch rod for my dirt bike.

If there's one thing worse than being really angry for no reason, it's suddenly remembering the reason.

There's nothing like a string of Xmas lights inside the house to make the whole family feel like they live in a vintage clothing store.

The average permanent lasts about four months.

You rarely get a convincing lecture on playing to your strength from a bald guy with a ponytail.

A lot of people have a particular song that, no matter their mood, turns them on. With me, it's Eleanor Rigby.