For men there are costumes like fireman, policeman and vampire. For women there are costumes like slutty fireman, slutty policeman and slutty vampire.

I got mugged about six months ago. The oddest thing about the entire situation, though, was that I wasn't afraid, which is strange because basically I experience my life through two primary emotions: fear and suppressed fear.

A lot of people think my sarcasm comes from insecurity and defensiveness, but I assure you I'm just being petty and cruel.

I'm of the generation of kids where the G.I. Joe's developed Kung Fu Grip right around the same time I did.

Marriage is like a row boat: it fits two, it doesn't work on auto-pilot and it's very difficult to have sex in.

There's something vaguely erotic about watching a woman eat a banana while cupping two plums.

I know that big, important things don't just come together overnight, but I've been me for a long time now and it's still not working.